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Why I Should Just Write

Updated: Aug 23, 2021

I love Spring with its fresh opportunities. And good thing because I'm doing what I do best: working in the unemployment industry.

Okay, so I was tired of working a department store retail job with its crazy hours and low pay. So I moved onto a different type of retail: commission furniture sales. The owner and I hit it off immediately and she hired me during my interview. To be honest, I really loved her and the other woman I ended up working with. But the job didn't end up a good fit for me. So, after a month of learning all about the products they sold and using their pitches to grab sales, I gave it up to return to what I love to do: art and literature.

I'm so exhausted by people bringing me down, telling me I need to get a job and make money blah, blah, blah. My biggest issue is I am an extremely emotional person. I burst into tears when yelled at. I fall into a depression when I feel I can't do anything right. And this is not an employer's issue. It's mine and mine alone.

Why can't everyone just be nice?

But that's not the real world. Unicorns don't blow rainbow farts, as much as I'd like that to be true. And I just can't "toughen up." I have two buttons. The "Tears and Wallow" button and the "Go Apeshit" button. I can't seem to find the in-between. And only a few people have seen me fly into a rage because it takes a lot to get me to that point. I can hold in a LOT before the dam breaks.

So, truth be told, I prefer to lead a content life of sereneness. I hate conflict. Except in fiction. Because in fiction I can control the conflict. My characters handle the pressures, the friction, the pain. Things I can't deal with in real life I can act out in my books, my screenplays, or my art.

I let Kohl's know I am available for rehire if they need someone. Just to have a few bucks in my bank account. But once again, I am leading with my heart. And I am going to complete my books.

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